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Sunday, January 23, 2011

ILL BE BETTER ♥

i read something in this website (STANDUPGIRL.COM) just now and I have experienced so much emotion as a result.. I have cried.. gotten angry.. felt broken.. been ashamed.. felt defensive.. and I have also been disgusted.. 

What are we doing with our lives?
What did i do with my life ?? 
Personally I am wishing to break the cycle, the routine that i have been doing !

So many girls on this site have come from broken homes.. Some girls have had no one to mother them because their own mothers were or are off sleeping around..Some of them grew up watching their mothers being beaten.. Some have been or are being sexually abused by the men in their mothers lives.

Now i will try to make a stand.. Please dont get me wrong.. Tz not being prideful arrogant one but a concern woman with love..

Short perfection.. poor choices.. so many on this site are parents.. like having responsibilities to protect their children and not drag them through the same rubbish that they have been through.. tell me if im wrong.. but i can feel them.. 

sooner or later.. im gonna be a mom.. but im thinking.. will I find it so hard to teach my daughter to act like a lady because I never acted like one ? I want to and should teach my daughter to be modest and pure but how can I do that if im not even modest and pure ?

I want to and should teach my son to respect women, but how will I do that if im showing them that men can come and go as they please and even hit me if they feel like it ?

I should teach my kids that drugs and alcohol can and will ruin their lives, but how can I do that if im just gonna leave them at the sitters house and go out clubbing and get high ?

When my kid will say a bad word that they learned from me, ill tell him that it is bad? What, is there a certain age when it becomes ok to talk like that ?


WILL I BE PERFECT ??
no !

my mom once said.. 


"set your life on a new path TODAY ! Don't mess around with things that hurt you drugs, alcohol"

If you have parents and you think they suck because they are always "preaching"at you and they "dont let you have any fun" reconsider what they may have learned from their mistakes..If you are gonna do it still.. know ur limits.. dont try over doing it.. (that was me for a while)

If your parentS dont care about what you are doing and they let your boyfriend live with you, or what ever, you can still make the choice to live your life responsibly.. Just because its allowed does not mean its ok!

If you are a mom, in and out of boyfriends, going to the bars for a little fun please think about when your kids get bigger they need you to set a good example..

Imagine your 15 yr old daughter telling you shes pregnant and had AIDS and that she doesnt know who the father is! 

I am so glad that someone cared enough to tell me the truth and where my life was going.. 

I hope I didnt hurt anyone with this but I do hope that it woke someone up cuaseim happy now..


IM NOT PERFECT.. BUT AT LEAST IM TRYING TO MAKE THINGS RIGHT NOW..

IM TRYING TO CLEAN UP NOW.. IM TRYING TO BREAK UP THE CYCLE..

I HOPE I CAN DO IT..

NOT TOTALLY CLEAN.. BUT AT LEAST... IM TRYING !!

2 comments:

  1. Wow, thank you for sharing all of this, I am a member and volunteer on Standupgirl.com, I actually wrote an article on there called Breaking the Cycle....From the sounds of your blog you have been greatly impacted by it and I am SOOOOOO thankful...Standupgirl.com has changed my life and I am so glad you are spreading the word through your blog about the site so that many more can be changed and impacted...I am here anytime you have questions or just want to chat...Love Meg, meg@standupgirl.com

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  2. thank you for your appreciation meg ! ♥♥♥

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